| Need to Know: If you are preparing to bring your child home, or have recently arrived home with your child, there are a number of things that are important to understand: First and foremost, keep in mind that while you have spent months, perhaps years, preparing your minds and hearts to welcome this child into your lives and become a family, your child has had little, if any, preparation for this incredibly huge and significant change. Remember one key word - Patience. Expect your child to have limited or no idea what a family is. Teaching our son this concept was incredibly hard. At 3 1/2 he knew only one thing - the orphanage. He understood authority, schedules, sharing, but not family. Giving your child the word Mama or Papa, is nothing more sometimes than a word for them. They have no warm memories to associate with that word. You will have to build those memories and the concept of family. Don't be too upset or surprised if your child doesn't react to you the way you expected or hoped. Don't take it personally. It takes time to become a family. In addition, orphanage life requires different skills than family life. In fact, survival skills for life in an orphanage may be "dysfunctional" in a family or American school system. Consider these points: Your child may not understand or even want you to take control. Having been self sufficient or in survival mode, may make it hard for your child to relinquish control. Or for that matter, to even trust you to be there. For six months after our son came home he would get mad and pee on me. Yes, pee. He would pull down his pants and pee all over my legs or shoes. It was very difficult not to walk out the door. But my son needed to give me his very worse. He didn't want to love me. He was terrified I would leave so he was going to push me away. At night the screams from his dreams would wake the house. It would be an understatement to say the transition was difficult. We made it. My son has been home a little over a year. Thank fully he no longer pees on me! He has learned to trust me. He is a wonderful sweet child. But it took patience and commitment. Also consider that your child was accustomed to extremely routinized life. I don't mean simple boredom. I mean routinized and scheduled. So these kids may have a very difficult time handling transitions or even simple choices. Fear of hunger is another point to consider. One of our daughters hid her bottles, her food, and would go nuts if food was left within her reach. I would love to say she is over that fear, but she isn't. We recently attended a picnic and she became terrified that the other children were hungry. After hiding food for herself she became the sneaky one to bring food to the other "babies". She would cry when caught that the babies were hungry. This went on until other mother's were begging me to stop her from giving their kids 6 or 7 or 10 cookies. My daughter is 2 1/2. The main thing for you to remember is every child is different. Every child has their own issues and memories. Be patient. Be committed. And love your child. |
International Adoption
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| Immigration It is my recommendation that as soon as you decide on a country and an agency you begin your immigration approval procedure. Go ahead and get a I600A application for the Department of Homeland security. After you receive approval, you may run into some snags on the timeline. Remember you are entitled to a free extension. You will need to write a letter requesting the extension, an updated home study, and make sure your finger prints are updated. Send this 90 days before your approval expires. |
A Home Study
A Home Study is
conducted by a licensed
Social Worker under the
direction of an agency in
the state where the
prospective parent(s)
reside. It is then
submitted to the agency,
to the USCIS, to the
foreign country, and
possibly to the court of
the state in which the
prospective parents
reside (state specific).
The Home Study agency
will conduct thorough
investigations on each
prospective adoptive
family. Their mission is
not to make you
uncomfortable but to
place children in safe,
loving homes.
Home Studies should be
written in plain language,
as they will be translated
for foreign courts.
Always request a copy of
your home study so that
you will have a copy for
your records and so that
you may proof read it for
accuracy.
A Home Study is
conducted by a licensed
Social Worker under the
direction of an agency in
the state where the
prospective parent(s)
reside. It is then
submitted to the agency,
to the USCIS, to the
foreign country, and
possibly to the court of
the state in which the
prospective parents
reside (state specific).
The Home Study agency
will conduct thorough
investigations on each
prospective adoptive
family. Their mission is
not to make you
uncomfortable but to
place children in safe,
loving homes.
Home Studies should be
written in plain language,
as they will be translated
for foreign courts.
Always request a copy of
your home study so that
you will have a copy for
your records and so that
you may proof read it for
accuracy.
| Education: While you wait, educate yourself on adoption, children, and your child's cultural history. It really could make a difference when you are facing difficult times with your child. One company that I highly recommend is http://www.adoptionlearningpartners.org. They have some really awesome programs. |
Hague Treaty
The purpose of the Hague Treaty is
to prevent the trafficking of children.
It should also give you the adopting
parent some peace of mind if you
are using a Hague approved
agency. Those agencies have met
a certain level of achievement in
their policies and procedures that
have satisfied the accreditation
committee for the protection of
children.
This translates in that you the
adoptive parent can relax a little bit
knowing that the child you are
adopting was legally obtained.
The purpose of the Hague Treaty is
to prevent the trafficking of children.
It should also give you the adopting
parent some peace of mind if you
are using a Hague approved
agency. Those agencies have met
a certain level of achievement in
their policies and procedures that
have satisfied the accreditation
committee for the protection of
children.
This translates in that you the
adoptive parent can relax a little bit
knowing that the child you are
adopting was legally obtained.
If your case involves a child
Law Office of Kim M Haney
662 871 0085
Kim@kimhaney.com
Law Office of Kim M Haney
662 871 0085
Kim@kimhaney.com
You Might Wish You
Had Known:
When a person or a couple decides to
adopt internationally there are things
that need to be considered.
What country?
Each country has a set of laws that
adopting parents must meet. These
include age, finances, number of
children in the home, divorces, and
religious beliefs.
And some countries have a few more
unusual requirements. For example:
If you want to adopt from Korea, you
cannot weigh more than 30% over the
normal weight for your height when
you work with certain agencies.
If you are single, male or female, forget
about adopting from Armenia,
Thailand, and Sri Lanka (among
others). No single adoptive parents
allowed.
If you want to adopt from St. Lucia, you
don’t have to be a resident but you do
have to own property on the island.
If Slovakia is your country of choice,
you must maintain long-term residency
in-country, and stay there during the
entire adoption process, which can
take a year or two.
If you want to adopt from Indonesia, a
two year in-country residency before
an application will be considered, and
a belief in God are required.
Had Known:
When a person or a couple decides to
adopt internationally there are things
that need to be considered.
What country?
Each country has a set of laws that
adopting parents must meet. These
include age, finances, number of
children in the home, divorces, and
religious beliefs.
And some countries have a few more
unusual requirements. For example:
If you want to adopt from Korea, you
cannot weigh more than 30% over the
normal weight for your height when
you work with certain agencies.
If you are single, male or female, forget
about adopting from Armenia,
Thailand, and Sri Lanka (among
others). No single adoptive parents
allowed.
If you want to adopt from St. Lucia, you
don’t have to be a resident but you do
have to own property on the island.
If Slovakia is your country of choice,
you must maintain long-term residency
in-country, and stay there during the
entire adoption process, which can
take a year or two.
If you want to adopt from Indonesia, a
two year in-country residency before
an application will be considered, and
a belief in God are required.
| Disclaimer: The information you obtain at this site is not, nor is it intended to be, legal advice. You should consult an attorney for advice regarding your individual situation. We invite you to contact us and welcome your calls, letters and electronic mail. Contacting us does not create an attorney-client relationship. Please do not send any confidential information to us until such time as an attorney-client relationship has been established. |
| United States Inter country Adoption Facts Inter country adoption is increasing. Over the last decade, the number of inter country adoptions to the U.S. has more than doubled. From October 2004 - September 2005 (FY 2005) US citizens adopted 22,739 orphans from around the world. Of these inter country adoptions, 13,241 were from countries that have joined the Convention. Top 10 Convention Countries from which U.S. Citizens adopted in FY 2005: 1. China 7,906 2. Guatemala * 3783 3. India 322 4. Colombia 291 5. Philippines 271 6. Mexico 88 7. Poland 73 8. Thailand 72 9. Brazil 66 10. Moldova 54 *Although Guatemala is a party to the Convention, its adoption procedures do not meet the standards of the Convention. |